T9 gave me herpes. And gingivitis.

In discussions with friends and family before departing for Rwanda, many people were surprised that I would have access to a cellphone. I assured them that were widespread in the Rwanda (almost of Africa, for that matter), and upon arrival this was confirmed. Everyone, I mean everyone, has cellphones. Okay, maybe not the gurgling, giggling babies strapped to women’s backs, but nearly everyone one else.

Unsurprisingly, cell phones in Africa come with all the attendant malfunctions, poor reception, and user error common elsewhere. The only major difference is that almost everyone uses pay-as-you-go phones, buying credit and loading it on via text message to the provider. Many Rwandans also own two phones, one for the MTN carrier and the other for the TIGO carrier, for a variety of cost- and convenience-related reasons. (I’m beginning to feel left out, about one third of volunteers with WorldTeach now have dual phones).

The most interesting quirk of the Rwandan phones (produced almost without fail in China) is the predictive text. It’s really quite confusing and illogical (as predictive text programs go). I’ve not been able to master the T9 here, so I don’t bother. However, other volunteers frequently use the predictive text function, with some highly interesting and bizarre consequences.

Just to illustrate, last weekend volunteers gathered in Kigali for the Saturday night throw-down in Rustenburg between the Red, White, and Blue and those imperialist dogs, the English. A fellow volunteer received a text from another volunteer who just flew to South Africa for a few matches (lucky!!!). Except that his T9 replaced the words “going to” with “gingivitis.” Well, that’s odd, I thought. Then a third volunteer suggested ever so casually that gingivitis was the least of one’s T9 worries. “T9 gave me herpes,” she said. Touché.